I’ve got your Happy Birthday SWINGIN’!
Few things in this world are sadder than the office birthday celebration. Yesterday, the office women were giving me shit for not telling them when my birthday is (it’s coming up in a few weeks). Sorry, but I can think of no worse place on the planet (other than prison or the Olive Garden) to celebrate another glorious year of life than the office. Eating bad grocery store cake and listening to another joyless rendition of “Happy Birthday” while I stare out the window at a gorgeous sunny day and wish that I was anywhere but at work are not the makings of a good time. These office birthday celebrations are symptoms of a larger, more insidious problem; people trapped in the work/office cycle who, rather than trying to plan their escape from these cubicle jail cells, try to bring more “excitement” into the office. Please. If you want to make things more exciting in the office let me wear jeans, swear loudly, show up and leave at my pleasure, and work from home. THAT would make work more exciting, not hearing why three-quarters of that cake will go uneaten because of your “diets.”